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No particular reason why. I was falling asleep on the sofa, so I went to bed, and then laid there wide awake for the next four hours. It was weird and I hated it. Now I'm freezing in my office, waiting for today's newsletter to go out, and feeling weird about what I put in it. Or rather didn't put in it, because it turns out I am extremely uncomfortable about sharing fic with people at all now. Thanks, fandom at large. You've completely ruined a perfectly good hobby for me, you bunch of fucking dickheads.
Nobody here, of course. That ought to go without saying, but I'll say it anyway. But it's very much the reason I nuked AO3, which I've talked about ad nauseam. I don't know if I need to just start over with a brand new fandom or what. The problem with that is starting over with a brand new fandom, because I don't want to write for a brand new fandom. I had 10,000 words of Thor fic in the barrel, ready to go, and just noped out last minute. Just decided, no I'm not going to share that, actually. I chickened out for exactly the same reason I initially chickened out on the first iteration of God of Outcasts, back when it was a totally different story 12 years ago. Some imaginary person might get their knickers in a twist about it, but it ran deeper than that. I actually got a physical stress reaction from it. It actually made me sick to think about posting it, so I removed the whole thing from the newsletter, apologised for not having it up when I'd said last week I planned on having new fic go out, and felt like shit about myself.
I went out to the front room after that and went to go work on my blanket some more, and watched the first series of Outsiders, which is another one I've been meaning to watch for a while. It's basically Survivor, but for idiots. I never much liked Survivor, because I don't like shows like that, that take themselves all hyper seriously and can't really see that nothing they do actually matters. But this one was really cute. It is just a bunch of dumbasses out in the woods for a week, doing the exact same stupid shit as you would see on Survivor, but 100% self-aware about how stupid it all is. One of my favourite bits was at the end of each episode where the contestants had to go back to their tents for the night, but David Mitchell would make a big scene about how he got to go home and sleep in a warm bed, because fuck this camping lark.
I only got through the first series before going to bed and not sleeping, but I went on the British Comedy Guide to look up if there was a third one on the way all the same, and saw the lineup has been announced. I'm familiar with five of the six of them, and oh god. It's a lineup of terminal stupidity and I cannot wait. I'm not gonna lie, I am curious to see how they manage to make it work with Chris McCausland, but he did do some camping stuff and Gladiator fighting on his recent show, so I can't imagine it'll be too much of a disaster. Or maybe it'll be exactly as much of a disaster as I'm imagining, in which case, excellent television. Sure, make a blind man do absurd physical challenges in the woods for a week. Nothing can possibly go wrong there. The other four I know, Alan Davies, Roisin Conaty, Judi Love, and Guz Khan, share three brain cells between them on a good day, and Alan Davies has about two of them. The only one I don't think I know is Laura Smyth, so I can't say anything about her to build her up or slag her off. But this show has been an absolute delight, and I think later this afternoon I'm probably gonna go watch the second series. Which, admittedly, is the one that finally tipped me over the edge to starting it, because I heard Joe Wilkinson and Jessica Hynes are are on a team together, and holy shit yes please. I saw a clip on Tumblr of Wilkinson ragging on David Mitchell about his age that had me nearly in tears, so I had to finally go find this thing. Which, I do have access to Dave as a channel, but the damn thing is so fucking buggy that often it's easier to just not stream from there anyway.
And today is Buzzcocks day, so that's always nice to look forward to. Also, speaking of BCG, yesterday they seem to have leaked the air date for series 16 of Taskmaster. But that was officially announced today, as September 21st. Which Alex Horne has responded to in his traditionally unhinged way. There's been a lot of talk over the years about fans over-stepping boundaries with creatives on social media, saying weird shit to them that they don't want or need to hear. Then Alex Horne goes and says weird shit on main that I'd wager a good number of the fans don't want or need to hear lol. And this is one of the tame ones. Don't even get me started on that Reddit AMA he did to promote the previous series.
In non-fandom ramblings, I'm waiting for some packages to get here from Amazon. I ordered a clock for my office, and that calendar ought to be getting here along with it. I don't really need a clock, necessarily, but I wanted one that can also tell me the temperature back here. All the other clocks in the house can do that, and I want one in my office that can do that, because this is the room I'm most deeply curious about in that area. It's always absolutely freezing back here this time of year, to the point it sometimes gets in the way of me doing anything because my brain just shuts down. I can see what the temperature outside is from the widget on my taskbar, but I really want to see what it gets to in here. Amazon also keeps annoying me, because I've been looking for some new shoes lately, even though in the end the ones I've found that I'm likely going to get for myself aren't even on Amazon. But they keep sending me recommendations, which is fine. I don't mind that part. The part I mind is this.
All the other emails I get from them are fine. It's specifically recommendations for shoes and shirts that are broken, and don't show up properly. Do you have any idea how difficult it was to censor my name when I couldn't even read the text in the first place? I actually didn't even realise my name was on there at first. And it's my wholeass name, first and last. I don't think any other Amazon emails address you with your full entire name. I use Thunderbird on dark mode, and it's hilarious that these specific emails are so broken. But the ones I think I'm gonna get are some red bottom oxfords. Not some super expensive designer ones, but a nice enough pair to look like they might be. I don't have any dress shoes right now, so I figure I might as well get a really nice pair, and then maybe get a few cheaper pairs for other occasions later. My husband, who cares a little bit less about these things, is fine with the cheap ones he's got, and I think he's got some plastic slip on shoes that pass as decent for most situations as well. But I have none. I think the last two funerals we went to, I wound up wearing my black and white Vans, because they were literally the ONLY shoes I had up until two weeks ago. I really did look like the dickhead at the club, tattooed and pierced in an ill-fitting suit and scuffed up old skate shoes. It wasn't a good look.
But for now, I'm waiting for this Amazon order to arrive, but the tracker thing is doing that thing where it's not actually telling me where the order is or when it's likely to arrive. Just that it's "out for delivery," which it likes to do. It used to give me better estimates, but it stopped doing that in recent months and I don't know why.
Nobody here, of course. That ought to go without saying, but I'll say it anyway. But it's very much the reason I nuked AO3, which I've talked about ad nauseam. I don't know if I need to just start over with a brand new fandom or what. The problem with that is starting over with a brand new fandom, because I don't want to write for a brand new fandom. I had 10,000 words of Thor fic in the barrel, ready to go, and just noped out last minute. Just decided, no I'm not going to share that, actually. I chickened out for exactly the same reason I initially chickened out on the first iteration of God of Outcasts, back when it was a totally different story 12 years ago. Some imaginary person might get their knickers in a twist about it, but it ran deeper than that. I actually got a physical stress reaction from it. It actually made me sick to think about posting it, so I removed the whole thing from the newsletter, apologised for not having it up when I'd said last week I planned on having new fic go out, and felt like shit about myself.
I went out to the front room after that and went to go work on my blanket some more, and watched the first series of Outsiders, which is another one I've been meaning to watch for a while. It's basically Survivor, but for idiots. I never much liked Survivor, because I don't like shows like that, that take themselves all hyper seriously and can't really see that nothing they do actually matters. But this one was really cute. It is just a bunch of dumbasses out in the woods for a week, doing the exact same stupid shit as you would see on Survivor, but 100% self-aware about how stupid it all is. One of my favourite bits was at the end of each episode where the contestants had to go back to their tents for the night, but David Mitchell would make a big scene about how he got to go home and sleep in a warm bed, because fuck this camping lark.
I only got through the first series before going to bed and not sleeping, but I went on the British Comedy Guide to look up if there was a third one on the way all the same, and saw the lineup has been announced. I'm familiar with five of the six of them, and oh god. It's a lineup of terminal stupidity and I cannot wait. I'm not gonna lie, I am curious to see how they manage to make it work with Chris McCausland, but he did do some camping stuff and Gladiator fighting on his recent show, so I can't imagine it'll be too much of a disaster. Or maybe it'll be exactly as much of a disaster as I'm imagining, in which case, excellent television. Sure, make a blind man do absurd physical challenges in the woods for a week. Nothing can possibly go wrong there. The other four I know, Alan Davies, Roisin Conaty, Judi Love, and Guz Khan, share three brain cells between them on a good day, and Alan Davies has about two of them. The only one I don't think I know is Laura Smyth, so I can't say anything about her to build her up or slag her off. But this show has been an absolute delight, and I think later this afternoon I'm probably gonna go watch the second series. Which, admittedly, is the one that finally tipped me over the edge to starting it, because I heard Joe Wilkinson and Jessica Hynes are are on a team together, and holy shit yes please. I saw a clip on Tumblr of Wilkinson ragging on David Mitchell about his age that had me nearly in tears, so I had to finally go find this thing. Which, I do have access to Dave as a channel, but the damn thing is so fucking buggy that often it's easier to just not stream from there anyway.
And today is Buzzcocks day, so that's always nice to look forward to. Also, speaking of BCG, yesterday they seem to have leaked the air date for series 16 of Taskmaster. But that was officially announced today, as September 21st. Which Alex Horne has responded to in his traditionally unhinged way. There's been a lot of talk over the years about fans over-stepping boundaries with creatives on social media, saying weird shit to them that they don't want or need to hear. Then Alex Horne goes and says weird shit on main that I'd wager a good number of the fans don't want or need to hear lol. And this is one of the tame ones. Don't even get me started on that Reddit AMA he did to promote the previous series.
In non-fandom ramblings, I'm waiting for some packages to get here from Amazon. I ordered a clock for my office, and that calendar ought to be getting here along with it. I don't really need a clock, necessarily, but I wanted one that can also tell me the temperature back here. All the other clocks in the house can do that, and I want one in my office that can do that, because this is the room I'm most deeply curious about in that area. It's always absolutely freezing back here this time of year, to the point it sometimes gets in the way of me doing anything because my brain just shuts down. I can see what the temperature outside is from the widget on my taskbar, but I really want to see what it gets to in here. Amazon also keeps annoying me, because I've been looking for some new shoes lately, even though in the end the ones I've found that I'm likely going to get for myself aren't even on Amazon. But they keep sending me recommendations, which is fine. I don't mind that part. The part I mind is this.
All the other emails I get from them are fine. It's specifically recommendations for shoes and shirts that are broken, and don't show up properly. Do you have any idea how difficult it was to censor my name when I couldn't even read the text in the first place? I actually didn't even realise my name was on there at first. And it's my wholeass name, first and last. I don't think any other Amazon emails address you with your full entire name. I use Thunderbird on dark mode, and it's hilarious that these specific emails are so broken. But the ones I think I'm gonna get are some red bottom oxfords. Not some super expensive designer ones, but a nice enough pair to look like they might be. I don't have any dress shoes right now, so I figure I might as well get a really nice pair, and then maybe get a few cheaper pairs for other occasions later. My husband, who cares a little bit less about these things, is fine with the cheap ones he's got, and I think he's got some plastic slip on shoes that pass as decent for most situations as well. But I have none. I think the last two funerals we went to, I wound up wearing my black and white Vans, because they were literally the ONLY shoes I had up until two weeks ago. I really did look like the dickhead at the club, tattooed and pierced in an ill-fitting suit and scuffed up old skate shoes. It wasn't a good look.
But for now, I'm waiting for this Amazon order to arrive, but the tracker thing is doing that thing where it's not actually telling me where the order is or when it's likely to arrive. Just that it's "out for delivery," which it likes to do. It used to give me better estimates, but it stopped doing that in recent months and I don't know why.
