lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
Ugh. Awful. Spent the whole day feeling dumb as a bag of rocks. Mostly I just sat around working on my blanket while I caught up on TMNZ on C4, and now I am fully up to date there. I've not watched series 4 yet, because C4 hasn't got the new series, but I can't be fucked to download it right now. But unfortunately I think TMNZ fell victim to the general fandom effect. Even getting past the New Show Weirdness, it was good, and I did enjoy it, but I still don't think it's better than TMUK. That's not its fault. But the way it was hyped up by its own little section of the fandom, I really was led to believe it would be better than TMUK. Because so many people do actually say that, to the point that I'm starting to get sick of seeing it even discussed on the subreddit if only because any time it's mentioned it actively devolves into an argument between the two factions of fans. I don't give a fuck either way, but the people who care really care, and this is becoming the big source of wank (right after the topic of RPF within the fandom).

It's a bit better on Tumblr, but Tumblr is slower to pick up on news and updates, so I'm hesitate to stop following the subreddit. I use them both for different reasons. Tumblr is where I go for traditional fandom interaction. Over there, it's more typical fansquee bullshit. There's a lot of old man thirst and fanart over there, and I love that. People on Tumblr are proper unhinged in all the best ways, and totally unashamed about it, and the different factions coexist rather seamlessly. I haven't seen TMAU, but I imagine it'll take off and become a third big faction soon enough, being another Anglophone version. Though funny enough, I don't think I've seen a single gif from it. Or if I have done, I haven't recognise it as being from TMAU. But there's only been one series so far, so we'll see. But my point is I don't see people on Tumblr fighting over it the same way I do on Reddit, which is both odd and refreshing. With the new UK series starting next week, I am both excited and nervous though, because new episodes do always bring the weirdos out into the open.

This franchise does have a unique sort of group psychosis almost that other fandoms I've been haven't really experienced before. And I've talked about this on Tumblr a bit. I have never been in a fandom before that has been so consistently spoilt for new content. Every fandom I've ever been in has always had big waits betwen new seasons/series. Always. Or if not televisual, then the release schedule was something else entirely. The Venture Bros would go years between seasons, just to drop twelve episodes or whatever. Sherlock made us wait years for three episodes that seemed hell-bent on telling the fans to go fuck themselves. Marvel have so many comic titles that they wind up pulling their titles for months at a time without warning, and then you go six months without seeing the one you're reading, with no explanation for why. Or sometimes it just gets cancelled for no reason at all. And the MCU is an over-saturated garbage fire that releases too much stuff that all stopped being good about eight years ago anyway.

TMUK releases two series a year, plus the New Year special. That's 21 episodes. 22 episodes if it's a Champion of Champions year (rumour has it that's filming in November, so next year, probably). TMNZ does one series a year, so if you watch that, you get 32 episodes a year. Now there's TMAU, which seems to be doing one a year, so that's 42 episodes a year. And those are just the Anglophone versions. Assuming they don't overlap, you've nearly got a new episode every week. If NZ and AU kick it up to two a year, this would be the most well-fed fandom I'd ever been in. I think it already is, honestly. TMNZ just aired its final episode for series 4, and there's a whole week's break between that and UK's series 16 starting next Thursday. This'll end toward the end of the year, take a little break, have it's New Year Treat, and if TMAU's second series airs the same time its first one did, there'll only be a few weeks in between the NYT and that. And while that's airing, it's entirely likely TMUK's series 17 will overlap. They don't seem to really care about spacing the series out with one another, because technically they're not in competition with another country's channels or ratings, but it sure makes for an interesting schedule for people who are following all of it. And it'll be interesting to see if (when) C4 does pick up TMAU as well. They aired TMNZ during a really bizarre time slot, on one of their weird tertiary channels, but it was all on catch up immediately so it didn't really matter. So is I think the Swedish version as well? Which is an odd one to have picked up before TMAU, but I bet there's some sort of exclusivity agreement, and that one probably won't show up on C4 until next year. I'm betting the same for TMNZ's series 4.

Although, they sure got TMUK's series 15 up on YouTube immediately, so Avalon seems to have got some hidden power from somewhere.

While I was completely zoned out on the couch all day watching this, I managed to blaze through three more stripes on my blanket, and now I'm on the very last one. I'd found a few more colours I hadn't realised I had left, and I didn't want to just leave them there, so I decided to use them anyway. The blanket is a really stupid size, but I don't care. My plan for today is to put the newsletter together and go finish the fucking blanket, I think. The weather's really cool, so I'll probably go for a walk as well. The summer weather has really got in the way of that, and I hate it so much, but I just get so miserable going out in the heat. The topamax makes it easy to overheat, and the pills for my stomach do the same so I'm at a double risk of just falling over dead on the pavement if I'm not careful. When I do go out, I've been listening to the Sun Also Rises, since I've finished my podcast and can't find anything else worth listening to. I really liked the podcast for going on walks, and it's what got me going out in the first place. I can't fucking believe I've lost about 100lbs on the back of some stupid podcast, and I'm really tempted to start going into the other one with Jack Bernhardt and Lou Sanders, but man, Lou Sanders can really grate after a while. Maybe I'll finish my book and then try giving the People's Podcast a go.

But I can't wait to finish this blanket. It needs to be done so I can never think about it again. My husband asked if the next one I start will be just as unhinged, and the answer was yes, of course it will, because I'm still trying to use up as much yarn as possible. I'm close to the goal of using up pretty much all of it, which was a lot of damn yarn, and then I can buy more without guilt, and start all over again.

Also, in the process of typing this up, I got a notice on my door that starting next week, they're going to start redoing the roof of our building, so that's going to be terrible for me. Not looking forward to that. My husband works nights, so idk how he's meant to sleep, with us on the top floor. They're scheduling it to take a week or two, and knowing how roofing works, the noise won't be right above us the entire time. The building is quite big, and presumably they'll be working from one end to the other over that time. We'll probably have two or three days of really bad noise above us, and since we're right on the end of the building, either be at the very beginning, or very end of it. Here's hoping, anyway.
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
The problem is I need to find a better place to go. The lake is a nice place to go, visually, but it's very difficult to get home quickly if I need to. The park is just, no. Too many people doing drugs on the path. The only other alternative is going back downtown, and battling traffic. But at least I can get home quickly if I need to, and there are interesting things to look at and enjoy. But I can't keep doing the pedal bike thing, because I've almost completely broken it, and it will break my ankle if I keep using it.

I watched series 2 of Outsiders yesterday, and it perfectly lived up to expectations. I absolutely adore Joe Wilkinson and Jessica Hynes though, so it was going to be a delight on those two alone. I haven't seen much from Phil Wang, but it was hardly surprising to see him in yet another ill-fitting full-body costume that did horrible things to his junk. This man is now defined by his cock and balls in my mind.

After I finished that, I became absolutely baffled to find that none of my usual sources had made this week's Buzzcocks available, which got me properly confused about what day it even was at one point. It's still not even up now, so I don't know what's going on. I'm even more confused because the schedule seems to have flipped around. I checked last week, and it was supposed to be Katherine Ryan in this episode, but it wasn't, and now I can't find any information on when that episode is supposed to air.

I have a dentist appointment later today, and then on my way home I'm gonna stop and pick up a pizza from the place I like down the road. Then, my husband and I are going to finish off a 19-year-saga and watch Radiant is the Blood of the Baboon Heart. I'm still so bittersweet about this being a movie, because I will die on the hill that Adult Swim needlessly cancelled the Venture Bros. The show was very clearly wrapping up anyway, and very easily could have tied everything up with one more season and been out of their hair forever regardless. But AS had to go and can a bunch of their popular shows to make room for what I presume to be shows nobody cared about at all in the end, taking after the Netflix model. I've read that the movie doesn't actually conclude anything though, so it does make me wonder what HBO has planned for the series going forward.

Over on Tumblr, there's a piece of fanart that keeps coming up on my dash, and I am absolutely obsessed with it. It's the sort of thing that when it pops up on my dash, I can't stop looking at it. My last few fandoms, I've been very much on the outside, not agreeing with any of the popular ideas or headcanons. So it's been an insanely weird experience this last year to find myself in a fandom where not only am I on the same page with pretty much everyone else, the whole lore of the show is effectively a tailor-made experience for the weirdos. So now a piece of art is going round that has practically illustrated one of my favourite headcanons, and it's so wonderfully drawn, and I'm realising lately that I haven't properly enjoyed a fandom experience like this since about 2009. Christ, that's sad. Literally, I think the only thing that could possibly make it better is if it wasn't on Tumblr.

And over here, yesterday I tidied up my journal a bit and deleted all the old fic announcement posts, since they don't link to anywhere anymore. I didn't think it was worth it to have them up in the archives if they were just going to point to error pages, or pages you needed passwords to get to. I'm keeping the fic notes up for now, but eventually I am going to move all of that stuff over to my website I think.
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
No particular reason why. I was falling asleep on the sofa, so I went to bed, and then laid there wide awake for the next four hours. It was weird and I hated it. Now I'm freezing in my office, waiting for today's newsletter to go out, and feeling weird about what I put in it. Or rather didn't put in it, because it turns out I am extremely uncomfortable about sharing fic with people at all now. Thanks, fandom at large. You've completely ruined a perfectly good hobby for me, you bunch of fucking dickheads.

Nobody here, of course. That ought to go without saying, but I'll say it anyway. But it's very much the reason I nuked AO3, which I've talked about ad nauseam. I don't know if I need to just start over with a brand new fandom or what. The problem with that is starting over with a brand new fandom, because I don't want to write for a brand new fandom. I had 10,000 words of Thor fic in the barrel, ready to go, and just noped out last minute. Just decided, no I'm not going to share that, actually. I chickened out for exactly the same reason I initially chickened out on the first iteration of God of Outcasts, back when it was a totally different story 12 years ago. Some imaginary person might get their knickers in a twist about it, but it ran deeper than that. I actually got a physical stress reaction from it. It actually made me sick to think about posting it, so I removed the whole thing from the newsletter, apologised for not having it up when I'd said last week I planned on having new fic go out, and felt like shit about myself.

I went out to the front room after that and went to go work on my blanket some more, and watched the first series of Outsiders, which is another one I've been meaning to watch for a while. It's basically Survivor, but for idiots. I never much liked Survivor, because I don't like shows like that, that take themselves all hyper seriously and can't really see that nothing they do actually matters. But this one was really cute. It is just a bunch of dumbasses out in the woods for a week, doing the exact same stupid shit as you would see on Survivor, but 100% self-aware about how stupid it all is. One of my favourite bits was at the end of each episode where the contestants had to go back to their tents for the night, but David Mitchell would make a big scene about how he got to go home and sleep in a warm bed, because fuck this camping lark.

I only got through the first series before going to bed and not sleeping, but I went on the British Comedy Guide to look up if there was a third one on the way all the same, and saw the lineup has been announced. I'm familiar with five of the six of them, and oh god. It's a lineup of terminal stupidity and I cannot wait. I'm not gonna lie, I am curious to see how they manage to make it work with Chris McCausland, but he did do some camping stuff and Gladiator fighting on his recent show, so I can't imagine it'll be too much of a disaster. Or maybe it'll be exactly as much of a disaster as I'm imagining, in which case, excellent television. Sure, make a blind man do absurd physical challenges in the woods for a week. Nothing can possibly go wrong there. The other four I know, Alan Davies, Roisin Conaty, Judi Love, and Guz Khan, share three brain cells between them on a good day, and Alan Davies has about two of them. The only one I don't think I know is Laura Smyth, so I can't say anything about her to build her up or slag her off. But this show has been an absolute delight, and I think later this afternoon I'm probably gonna go watch the second series. Which, admittedly, is the one that finally tipped me over the edge to starting it, because I heard Joe Wilkinson and Jessica Hynes are are on a team together, and holy shit yes please. I saw a clip on Tumblr of Wilkinson ragging on David Mitchell about his age that had me nearly in tears, so I had to finally go find this thing. Which, I do have access to Dave as a channel, but the damn thing is so fucking buggy that often it's easier to just not stream from there anyway.

And today is Buzzcocks day, so that's always nice to look forward to. Also, speaking of BCG, yesterday they seem to have leaked the air date for series 16 of Taskmaster. But that was officially announced today, as September 21st. Which Alex Horne has responded to in his traditionally unhinged way. There's been a lot of talk over the years about fans over-stepping boundaries with creatives on social media, saying weird shit to them that they don't want or need to hear. Then Alex Horne goes and says weird shit on main that I'd wager a good number of the fans don't want or need to hear lol. And this is one of the tame ones. Don't even get me started on that Reddit AMA he did to promote the previous series.

In non-fandom ramblings, I'm waiting for some packages to get here from Amazon. I ordered a clock for my office, and that calendar ought to be getting here along with it. I don't really need a clock, necessarily, but I wanted one that can also tell me the temperature back here. All the other clocks in the house can do that, and I want one in my office that can do that, because this is the room I'm most deeply curious about in that area. It's always absolutely freezing back here this time of year, to the point it sometimes gets in the way of me doing anything because my brain just shuts down. I can see what the temperature outside is from the widget on my taskbar, but I really want to see what it gets to in here. Amazon also keeps annoying me, because I've been looking for some new shoes lately, even though in the end the ones I've found that I'm likely going to get for myself aren't even on Amazon. But they keep sending me recommendations, which is fine. I don't mind that part. The part I mind is this.



All the other emails I get from them are fine. It's specifically recommendations for shoes and shirts that are broken, and don't show up properly. Do you have any idea how difficult it was to censor my name when I couldn't even read the text in the first place? I actually didn't even realise my name was on there at first. And it's my wholeass name, first and last. I don't think any other Amazon emails address you with your full entire name. I use Thunderbird on dark mode, and it's hilarious that these specific emails are so broken. But the ones I think I'm gonna get are some red bottom oxfords. Not some super expensive designer ones, but a nice enough pair to look like they might be. I don't have any dress shoes right now, so I figure I might as well get a really nice pair, and then maybe get a few cheaper pairs for other occasions later. My husband, who cares a little bit less about these things, is fine with the cheap ones he's got, and I think he's got some plastic slip on shoes that pass as decent for most situations as well. But I have none. I think the last two funerals we went to, I wound up wearing my black and white Vans, because they were literally the ONLY shoes I had up until two weeks ago. I really did look like the dickhead at the club, tattooed and pierced in an ill-fitting suit and scuffed up old skate shoes. It wasn't a good look.

But for now, I'm waiting for this Amazon order to arrive, but the tracker thing is doing that thing where it's not actually telling me where the order is or when it's likely to arrive. Just that it's "out for delivery," which it likes to do. It used to give me better estimates, but it stopped doing that in recent months and I don't know why.
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
I went to hang out at the neighbour's today. It's a weird relationship I have with her, because I enjoy having someone to hang out with, and she's fun to hang out and pass a joint with, but every now and then she can be an amazingly bitter person.  Like, she has beef with half the building, and wants to make that everyone else's problem.  She's also a perfectly distilled essence of every toxic relationship I think I've ever had, so I don't go out of my way to spend a lot of time or get overly close with her. She's two doors down from me, but she won't come over here for anything.  The only way she'll interact is if I go over there.  She wants to borrow something, but I have to take it to her.  She wants to have dinner, but only at hers.  It's a very odd series of small gestures of control that I'm willing to indulge in small doses, admittedly only because I know she has to move out by the end of the month and I'll never see her again.  She told me today that she accidentally deleted my phone number, and I think she expected me to give it to her again, but I just played up the role of autistic idiot and completely missed the implication by choice.  I think I'd be willing to be a little more generous about her behaviour, if she didn't also complain about being single quite as often as she does.  But like, there's a pattern here, and I've been in the middle of it enough times to see it.  But I'm sure this is something my therapist can give some insight about, so maybe I should write it down in my little book to discuss the next time I see her.

I've also been working on the new format for the newsletter, which is basically the old, original format.  Going forward, that's going to be the only way to get fanfic, so sign up over there if you want it.  I'm going to be piecemeal tidying up all my old fic and putting it back on my site over the coming months, and also working on new fic, and using the newsletter to announce both.  Fic on my site will be posted both as plaintext and ePub downloads, the latter being made available only once the fic is complete.  In both instances, the fic will only be available on my site.  I'm not going to be sending it out directly to the newsletter, because well.  I write some weird shit, and putting it in the newsletter directly without any way of age-gating or anything feels unwise.  I'll also be posting art and other projects there as well, so it's not just fanfic.  Basically, all my creative projects will be posted there, so it's a good way to keep up to date on everything.

I have found it oddly nerve-wracking though.  Like, working on fic in any capacity has become irritatingly anxiety-inducing, which is very counter-productive to everything I want from something that ought to be a hobby.  Even just putting something up on the site that was already written made me giddy and weird in a wholly uncomfortable way, which is definitely something else to discuss with my therapist.  I didn't think fandom had fucked me up that badly, but apparently it has.  I'd thought that pulling my fic from AO3 was largely an action done out of protest, but it seems to have been as much out of self-preservation.  There's a fic I quite badly want to start working on again, but even as I opened the Scrivener project for it, I began to feel massively uneasy about it.  Just the thought of it being seen filled me with a sort of dread that I didn't like, and then I realised I'd have to charge up my iPad and pull a few books off my shelves, ick ick ick.  I don't even know when my next appointment is, but now I need to get my schedule book out of my bag and look I guess.

lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)

I can't get individual chapter stats on AO3, but I can see that one person clicked on my announcement for this morning's God of Outcast chapter, and followed it to AO3.

But this chapter in particular, Rötgart, is one of the big reasons for not only the rewrite, but for shuffling around some of the chapters to put them first.  Particularly, this is a big callback to the second chapter, Dwarf's Ransom.  Previously, that one had been posted as its own standalone fic, and very few people read that one as a standalone.  Which is hilarious, because like, three days after I posted it, Marvel dropped a comic where the entire plot sprung from the myth I used as the basis of that fic. 

But God of Outcasts is really funky, because the first 20k+ words have nothing to do with the main character of the story.  And I know this puts a lot of people off.  I've talked about it before, even.  But now I find myself wondering how many people actually read that second chapter.  Like, how many people skipped it, and are now wondering what the hell is going on as Loki winds up retracing Old Loki's steps.

I'm going to start off each arc with a Tales of Yggdrasil story, using those to establish for the reader things that Loki doesn't know, because Loki has been lied to.  And Dwarf's Ransom answers a lot of questions posed in Those Who Hunt Monsters.  One or two people have even commented on that, and I love it.  But the weird shit presented without context is the context.  Dwarf's Ransom is a twist on the backstory presented in Agent of Asgard #3, where Old Loki and Odin go on this mad romp together.  But it's a different myth, and a different context to their friendship.  Once which wound up being hilariously relevant within canon.

But I am curious, if you're reading God of Outcasts, did you read the first two chapters, or did you skip them?  Laufey and Odin are not popular characters, so I know it's an odd choice to open a story with them as central characters.  But I wanted to open the story with them so when Loki started uncovering weird secrets, the reader is one step ahead of him.

lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)

I took a big, long break from fandom, and came back this year with a lot of activity.  My stats are a bit fucky, because of the way AO3 handles updates etc, so rather than looking at just 2021, I'm looking at my account as a whole.  I have two accounts (one for polished fic, and one for WIPs that live in purgatory), and between them I have 241 fics, and have written 1,845,003 words.

Anyway, here we go.


For the LokiOfSassgaard account:

In the end, even though it's nowhere near my favourite, I'm very glad I exhumed Trickster God from the grave.  I thought real hard about putting Midgard Legends in my top five, but it lost out entirely on the fact that by the end, I'd lost interest to the point that I forgot to post the final chapter for several years.  For Tarbell, the rewrite definitely wins out over the original.  They're not too much different, but enough got changed that I like the slightly slower pace of the new one a little better.  I have a feeling that next year, the Isla Nublar rewrite might usurp its original version as well.


For the Sassgaardian account:

This was kind of a tough one to pick favourites, because the ones I would have picked aren't on this account.  There are a few I've moved and hidden in an unrevealed collection while I rework them (When the Dust Settles is one, which would have dominated had it still been listed on this account).  I waffled on including Key Largo, because while the experience behind it turned really sour, I do love the idea and would like to try to finish it next year.  And the WKM collection gets a mention, because it's actually what Little Beirut used to be.  I'm not terribly coy about admitting that, because it's become so common these days that there's little point in hiding it.

I did find it really funny how the same fics kept coming up on my main account, while my purgatory account is a lot more random in the types of attention different things got.  I know some people are going to take the "least popular" metrics and try to tell me not to focus on that, but I don't care.  A lot of my fic pre-dates AO3, and is for tiny fandoms that were already dead by the time the archive was founded.  The exception is anything I'd written for Sherlock, but that fandom got so fucking toxic I deleted every single fic I'd ever written for it, and only recently re-uploaded all of it.  Frankly, I'm always surprised whenever something that isn't Marvel gets attention.

And I'm very curious to see how these stats will change next year, after I've gone insane from posting so many new stories.

lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
When invites first started going around, I signed up for an account, looked around the site (what I could see past a sea of 500 errors), and decided I kind of hated it.

I think a big part is the name.  I still hate the name.  It's part of this trend of infantilising the internet that I've always found really cloying and uncomfortable.  And now that trend seems to have largely passed, and welp.  They're stuck with it.

But with Tumblr completely shitting the bed this week, people started talking about Pillowfort again and I figured I'd give it another look.  And... I'm still not sold.  It's not very intuitive, its TOS is vague as hell, and something about it just seems off.  And that's all completely aside from the fact that it's pretty dead.  I joined a bunch of communities way back in the day, and some of them have never been posted to.  A couple have fairly decent member numbers, in the thousands, and there are still weeks between posts.

What I find particularly odd is the way it's trying to be two different things at once.  It's trying to be LJ with the communities, and Tumblr with the feed and reblogging.  And it's not a very smooth melding of the two.  I made a few posts just to see how it works, and what particularly caught me off-guard is the way reblogging to communities works.  First I made the mistake of posting directly to a community, and realised that no record of that post existed on my own account.  Even on LJ, you could see that a person was active in communities, even if their journal was empty.  But when I posted to the community, if I wanted my own followers to see it as well, I had to reblog my own post to my blog.  That was weird.  Didn't like that.

So then I turned around and did it the other way; made a post to my own blog, and then reblogged it to a community.  I suppose it makes sense that I'd have to re-add the tags when I reblog, but it seems funky to me that a site that has built itself up very heavily on the way its tag filters work, the tags would carry over.

If I do continue to use this site, I can't see myself using the communities very often, in all honesty.  It's a weird faff that's awkward enough on desktop, and I wouldn't even want to try it on my iPad.

And that's another thing that vexes me.  The fuzzy dates.  The site's tip page says to hover over the stamp to get the exact date, but I do most of my internetting from my iPad.  I'm only at my desk when I need to edit or format something.  I don't like fuzzy dates.  Especially when they only go as high as months, so I'll see a post from 37 months ago, instead of... what is that?  Two and a half years?  I hate that.

You can follow me if you want, and I've been following people back.  Mostly, I'll likely just be announcing fic over there, and doing little else though.
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
If you follow me on AO3, you probably just got a couple of emails for fics you've already seen.

A few months ago, while I was trying to rework God of Outcasts, I threw everything from the previous version into an unrevealed collection, so I could focus on the new version without getting distracted by what was already up.  Tonight, I put little alert messages at the beginning of each one, linking to the new version, and released them all back into the wild again.

This both changed the date on every single fic, and re-published them as if they were brand new.  I've tried to correct the dates, but it wasn't working, and I gave up.  But everything, minus Isla Nublar, is back up.  I know a few people were concerned about deleted fics, but nothing was ever deleted; you just couldn't see it.  Isla Nublar is still hidden because I have been slowly editing it up, since it was originally typed up on an iPad with no ability to spellcheck or anything fancy like that.  As much as I would like to republish that one properly, one chapter at a time, I don't want to lose the stats it has.  So I shan't be doing that.  It'll all go up at once at some point next year.  Unless enough of it gets changed to alter the chapter count.  Then I'll release the unedited version back into the wild, and post a new version.  That's happened in the past with other fics, so I'm not ruling it out just yet.

Anyway, sorry for the confusion, but at least AO3 groups emails together now, so you didn't get like, 20 of them at once.
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)

Well, that was dumb as hell and I loved every second of it. The series was, ultimately, everything I wanted from it. It didn't have to make a whole lot of sense, or be some amazing cinematic masterpiece, because What If comics are by their nature dumb as hell and don't make a lot of sense. And I feel like anyone who expected otherwise is kind of missing the point.

I was a bit confused at first about Gamora showing up, because we never saw her story. I couldn't figure out if that was just me having no memory of the episode, though. Which is a problem for me, because I will just lose entire days sometimes. But I double checked, and it does seem like this was her only appearance. So I do think it was a bit odd that the finale just kind of ignored episode 3, and then introduced someone brand new. It's obviously not an off-shoot of episode 3, because Tony's still alive.

And can we just take a moment to talk about how whoever was in charge of this series just really does not like Tony Stark. We watched this fool die three times, and then get utterly disrespected in the finale. Like, bro. WTF did Tony ever do to you? lol

Overall, I think the stories did get better as the series progressed though. Episode 1 was just the First Avenger with a different skin for most of it, and episode 2 was kind of the TV equivalent of a curtainfic for the first act. Episode 3 was Fury's Big Week, remixed, and while it had some funny moments, didn't feel very fresh. I don't think the series properly picked up until episode 4, with Strange. This was the first episode where it felt like they were deviating from the script, even though it did play with the same mechanic the film used, fussing about with Time loops (though to a very different end). I think episode 5 was probably the low point for me overall though, just because I've been bored with zombies since 2005. The absolute high point was episode 6 though, just because the plot took about eight left turns by the end. Tony Stark basically being Justin Hammer hit all my buttons, and Killmonger's story was very engaging, I thought. Episode 7 was just pure stupidy, and even though it ultimately made no sense at all, I laughed the entire way through it, and really that's all I asked.

Doing the finale in two parts was a really good idea, I think, because it gave them a full episode to set up the threat and raise the stakes. I think if they'd gone and tried to cram everything into a single episode, we would have lost a lot of the really goofy character moments that were present in the final episode.

That final scene though. The one after the credits. Again, hmm. I think this is my one complaint about the series, how Peggy's story as Captain Carter wasn't about Peggy. It was still about Steve. Just let the man die. Fuck's sake. Give the woman her own story. I'm over Steve. I don't care about him anymore. Get lost.

But Loki getting a flying kick to the face? Yes, love that. I am always down to see that loser get owned. More of that, please.

Overall though, very pleased. Enjoyed this series very much, and according to IMDB, there's a second season on the horizon, which I am totally down for. I'd love to see it focus on some of the newer characters, because outside of the zombie episode, and a couple of outliers, it was mostly Phase 1 and 2 characters.

lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)

This has lived in my head ever since I saw it in cinema, and I still cannot quite reconcile how they "solved" the Thanos problem.  I was really glad when Falcon went into some of the fallout from it, and am really hoping that more of Phase 4 addresses how utterly messed up the solution was, because holy shit.  It was honestly terrible.

I know a lot of people, particularly in the Thor fandom really hate Infinity War, but I genuinely liked it.  I genuinely liked Endgame as well, except for Tony's unrelenting selfishness.  And I think the part about it that really bothers me is how much it felt like a huge backslide for him and his character.  

Tony's entire hero's journey was centred around realising that other people are, well, people.  That there was more to life and reality than what he wanted.  

So, okay.  Let me back it up a bit, and clarify precisely what about Endgame I can't stand.

They only bring back the people who were snapped, on Tony's insistence, because he couldn't lose what he'd found.  They changed nothing else.  Only the people who were snapped.

And Falcon did at least address part of this issue, and I was so glad, because it had been two years at that point.  Two years and I was still going mad over this.  But finally, there was a little bit of acknowledgement to why that was stupid.  We had people popping back up in houses that were occupied by someone else.  Popping back up in the aftermath of war and border shifts.  Popping back up to a world that had no more room for them, that had moved on because there weren't resources for them.  There weren't jobs for them.  There wasn't space for them.  It was a world they no longer belonged to.

And Spider-man kind of gave a wink and a nod to this as well, with the kids coming back and having many of their peers having aged past them.

But neither of these addressed the other part of why Tony's plan was so utterly selfish.  Because they brought back only the people who were snapped.  Not the people who died from collateral damage.  In Infinity War, we see cars and helicopters crashing.  Trains, and planes would have crashed.  It was chaos.  This isn't speculation; we were shown this.  How many people in Clint's position realised their entire family was gone and committed suicide in the aftermath?  How many children, or elderly or disabled people starved to death because they were locked inside a house with nobody to take care of them?  And WandaVision kind of gave a wink and a nod to this as well, when Monica came back to learn Maria had died over those five years, but she didn't die as a direct result of the snap.

How many people did?  How many people died when the train they were riding crashed, or the aeroplane they were on continued on autopilot until it fell out of the sky?

How many people were on those trains or planes, or on the freeways, who were spared of the snap, and their family was spared of the snap, only to have that ripped away by the inevitable accidents we saw happen in Infinity War?  How many people were traumatised by being spared of the snap only to survive an accident that killed the rest of their family?  A family that also survived the snap, but died in the ICU, or never even made it to the hospital at all.

Why didn't these people get their families back?

These speculations are a bit macabre, but these aren't some made up scenario.  There were news stories in early 2020 coming out of China of children, and elderly and disabled people who were dying not of the virus, but of the consequences of lockdown.  Road accidents that destroy families happen every day.  Survivor's guilt is a very real thing that tears people apart in the aftermath of trauma and tragedy.

But Endgame just kind of ignored all of this.  It was as if that final scene in Infinity War never happened.  As if we never saw the chaos on the street, or the helicopter fall into the side of a building.

And then, five years later, how many of these people were forced to re-live this trauma when people came back?  When their neighbours' husbands and wives and children returned, but their family is still gone because a man driving an 18-wheeler disappeared from behind the wheel?

And people liked to joke about how Clint was still paying Laura's phone bill.  But how many people who were snapped came back and were immediately killed?  We saw that chaos in WandaVision, when Monica came back and the hospital was instantly overwhelmed.  She came back exactly where she'd been before.

How many people were brought back, only to fall out of the sky from 30,000 feet?  How many people materialised on freeways, or on train tracks?  How many people died as a direct result of being brought back?

So I ask, one more time, how in the fuck was "only the people who were snapped" at all a viable solution?  How was Tony allowed to become so needlessly selfish?  Tony, whose entire third film was framed around his own trauma from New York?

He wanted to keep what he found?  They had all six stones.  As Thanos said, reality was theirs to control.  They could have done whatever the hell they wanted.  He could have kept his family and put everything back to the way it should have been.  And this was their solution.

The Time Heist was so goddamn good, and then the whole thing was completely let down by the laziest character assassination in Marvel's history.  And that's what it was.  Lazy writing that amounted to character assassination.  Where did Tony's empathy go?  Because I never saw a shred of it in Endgame.  His falling out with Steve and the tension between them, great.  Love it.  Fantastic.  But I cannot forgive the selfishness of that decision.  

What the hell were they thinking with it?

This had better be addressed in upcoming films, because if the fallout ends with the Flag Smashers, I'm gonna riot.

ship lol

Mar. 7th, 2021 07:44 pm
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
I was looking around for some prompts to fill last night, which is tough, because all the Marvel prompt/kink memes have been dead for years. I found a few prompt challenges on AO3 and started scrolling through to see if anything sung to me.

I saw one that was for Thorki that was almost interesting enough for me to try, despite this not really being my jam. And then at the bottom, "NO BROTHER CALLING."

Like. What?

The setup was very clearly not AU. They definitely wanted the incest siblings thing. But apparently calling one another brother, as they do so frequently in all versions of canon, was a step too far.

I only recently even had an "Oh, I get it now" moment with this ship. People who have known me for a while are aware that things like fluff and romance are foreign languages to me sometimes. Every attempt I've ever made at these things turns weird. I miss the days of After Dark communities on LJ, where depravity was the lingua franca. So having this fucking juggernaut ship that seemed to consist of a lot of misplaced fluff never really sat right with me. But that's what Tumblr perpetuates, and unfortunately the MCU was timed to perfectly coincide with the fall of LJ. So all us darkfic fuckers never found a good place to congregate. But insomnia has been kicking my ass for the last few weeks, and I've fallen into this bizarre rabbit hole on AO3. I've read a LOT of really messed up shit, after accidentally clicking on something after not reading the tags properly.

And there it was. That "oh" moment. I understand. When it's framed as the messed up shit it is, it works. Like, a lot.

So then I see this prompt that looks like it wants to go in that direction, and then it veers hard away from it by asking the filler to avoid all of the icky connotations. And this is exactly why I've spent the last decade not reading the majority of fic in this stupid fandom.
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
It's quieted down a bit over the last couple of days, but there has been some bizarrely weird wank on Tumblr lately. Wank that harkens back to awful 2011 fanon that made me want to tear my eyeballs out then.

TL;DR, people are PISSED that they keep giving Loki knives and weapons and having him fight in the MCU.

Now, granted, they definitely de-powered him for some odd reason, and his magic seems to be parlour tricks at best. But man, that fanon from a decade ago, that Loki is a delicate flower who is nothing without his magic has really held strong. And I don't get it. I guess, Eir-Gram, Gram, Lævateinn, Jarnbjorn, and his unnamed whip mean nothing.

Look. Loki should be both fighting and casting forbidden magic. He can do both! idk why people seem to think it's either one or the other, when doing both has been a big part of his edge for so long.

The MCU is a fucking mess, and I would love to know why they went in the direction they did with pretty much everything in the Thor movies.
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
Goodness, some of this was more difficult than it needed to be.

So, I recently got back on Tumblr, and was incredibly surprised to find that whoever had been squatting my old URL gave up, because lo! It was available! Neat. Except, I'm an idiot, and put it on a sideblog, because idk. That was fine for about two weeks, but like, it's really hard to build up any kind of a social presence when everything you do goes through a completely unrelated name. Can't reply to people as me, follows come from some random business account, etc. I don't want that.

So I got fed up enough with it today that I set up a new account, and very quickly switched my URL over. So now I am me, on a main blog. Neat. Except, Tumblr is dumb and I could not figure out how to work out the queue. Like, a wholeass button was gone. Couldn't find it. After accidentally spamming about 50 posts to my blog, instead of my queue, I finally found it buried in some hidden settings menu.

But, anyway. Hey. I'm back on Tumblr, operating a horny on main thirst blog, as the gods intended.

Then I figured I might as well go whole hog, and put my username back as the default on AO3. Which was surprisingly easy, and took about three seconds. Tumblr could learn something from that.
lokiofsassgaard: animated icon of a man with a gun. caption: “fucking why?” (Fucking Why)
Every one of my fics are now mistagged. You know, that series where comic!Loki is fucking up the MCU? I don’t like tagging it with comic tags, because it’s not really obvious that this is the premise. He’s just a different Loki for the most part.

But why? Why did this tag disappear? It exists for Captain America. It exists for Hellboy. But the “All Media Types” tag for Thor now canonises as “Thor (Movies)”. That’s the exact opposite of what I want those fics tagged as. And now if I do start tagging for comics canon as well, it’ll get filtered as a crossover. I don’t want that either, because it’s not.

For fuck’s sake, why you do this to me AO3?
lokiofsassgaard: photo of a plague doctor in a red Hawaiian print shirt and a black necktie, wearing a white Panama hat (Default)
I think I want to try to get back into the fic-writing side of fandom. I quite miss it. I miss the meta and the social aspect.

I’m going to do that by posting my fic here, and if I can still find them, posting story/chapter notes for everything. I fear they may have all been yeeted when I deleted my previous blog.

I’ll start by mirroring everything here. I may or may not go in chronological order. I’m not sure. I’m also not sure if I’ll do the big ones by-chapter, or just post them as a whole.

Either way, I miss it. And I think going back over my older fic will help me get back into it.

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